Archive for the ‘AA – Lita’s thoughts’ Category

11
Nov

Teenagers Health

   Posted by: Lita

 

Did you give your 15 year old daughter a hug and a kiss last night before she went to bed?  Did you feel warm and fuzzy when you left her room because you had a glimpse of the sweet little girl that you so seldom see anymore? 

Were you surprised when you got up this morning to find that your 15 year old daughter had vanished during the night and someone you have come to know as Dr. Jekyll appeared in her place? 

Research indicates that teenagers require between 9 and 10 hours sleep per night.  The average teenager is getting approximately 6 hours sleep per night and is most likely completely sleep-deprived.

Due to the very fast-paced society that we live in many parents are also depriving themselves of sleep.  It is difficult to expect your child to shut down the computer or turn off the tv if it is your family’s lifestyle to stay up late participating in stimulating activities.  Add homework, sports, extra curricular activities, poor food choices and the addition of computers, cell phones, text messaging and online interactive forums, such as Facebook and video games, and it’s no wonder our teenagers are rarely taking the time to take care of their own bodies.

Consider some ways you can participate in helping your teen get more sleep:

         Do you have a spot in your home, other than a bedroom, that your teen can do homework, work on the computer and visit with friends?  Do your best to help your teenager maintain her room as a peaceful sanctuary.

         Encourage healthy snacks before bed.  It is best to avoid salty foods before bed because they can stimulate the adrenal gland.  Going to bed hungry can also contribute to sleep problems.  Bedtime snacks of crackers and cheese, half of a meat, poultry or tuna fish sandwich or a glass of warm milk may encourage the release of sleep inducing serotonin.

         Do your best to limit strenuous activities several hours before bedtime. 

         Encourage relaxation for an hour or so before bedtime.  Listening to music, reading or taking a warm bath before bed can be relaxing.  Computers and cell phones are best turned off at least an hour before bed.

         If your teenager is complaining of insomnia try some home remedies.  A popular herb for insomnia is Valerian.  Try serving a herbal tea containing Valerian or mix your own with 1 tsp of chamomile, 1 tsp hops, 1 tsp valerian root and 1 cup of boiling water.  Steep for 45 minutes, strain and then have your teenager drink the tea 1 hour before bedtime.    

         Offering your teenager the occasional back or foot rub at bedtime can be very helpful in promoting bedtime.

Never underestimate the problem of teenagers being sleepy in the daytime.  Sleep-deprivation impairs mood and affects performance while drowsiness and fatigue have been shown to cause many traffic accidents with teenagers at the wheel.  Disciplinary problems, sleepiness and poor concentration in school can be attributed to a lack of sleep.

Teenagers don’t think of sleep as a priority.  Going to bed at a reasonable hour and waking up on time should be, in the majority of cases, your teenager’s responsibility.  When your teenager is not handling this necessity in a responsible manner it is best that you step in and try some of the above techniques and as much positive encouragement as possible. 

 

Your Dad tells you about a friend of his, someone you have heard him recently start talking about, who is down on his luck.  He tells you a story about this fellow not being able to find work and all the trouble he is having with the government and his family.  What your Dad doesn’t tell you is he took this fellow to the bank with him last week and withdrew $10,000 and handed it over to him with nothing more than a handshake as collateral.

While you are visiting with your Mother you notice a bundle of wire transfer receipts on her desk totaling in excess of $40,000.  She tells you she is investing in a new offshore tax haven.  Upon further investigation you suspect she is being scammed by fraudulent telemarketers.

Our parents become vulnerable as they grow older and lonelier.  As a result they can become victims of scams or eldercare predators.

You must help empower your parents to recognize predators by regularly discussing ways they can prevent becoming victims.  Discuss the following buzz words with your parents and encourage them to be on guard if they hear these:

         “Act Now” or the offer will not be available;

         Do not miss this “no risk” offer;

         You must “send money” in order to receive your prize;

         You’ve won a “free gift, vacation or prize” but you must send money to cover postage and handling;

         No we do not have any literature we can send you.

Urge your parents to resist high pressure sales tactics from telemarketers.  Remind them continually of the following:

         Hang up if they are asked to pay for a prize;

         Never disclose their bank account, credit card or any personal information to anyone unless they know who they are dealing with;

         Always ask for written information if they are interested in something;

         Tell the caller not to call again and hang up.

Insist on meeting your parents’ new friends.  It is worth the time it takes to drop around for a cup of tea and visit. If you suspect this new friend is taking advantage of your parent you will be better positioned to prevent it by knowing more about them.  You can alert your parents’ financial institution and investment advisors of your suspicions while giving them your name and phone number.   If your parents have trusted neighbors and friends alert them to your suspicions.  Call your community police for information and resources on handling this problem.  Fraudulent people are less likely to act if they know family and friends are concerned and watching. 

There have been many cases of fraudulent persons having people’s wills changed, conning victims into marriage, obtaining a Power of Attorney and having property transferred into their names.  If your parents think you are prying too much but you suspect this type of behavior it may be necessary to get legal advice on guardianship as quickly as possible.  You may need to remove your parents from their home, and away from the fraudulent person or persons, immediately and have them stay with you until you get the situation under control. 

6
Nov

IS YOUR PARENT BECOMING YOUR CHILD?

   Posted by: Lita Tags:

It creeps up on you.  It is not just one event or something said but one day you realize you have become a parent to your own parent.  It is rather shocking and sad at the same time. 

You could be in your 50s and all of your life your parent has been there for you in a nurturing, parenting role and suddenly they are leaning on you to help them with the simplest tasks or they need you to bring them up to speed on technology that has completely escaped them.  You can spend countless hours teaching them but you know they will never really understand it or be able to keep up and it disturbs you.  It disturbs you that your parent has become a person that you don’t recognize.  Your parent is someone completely different from the person who loved and nurtured you all you life.

You make plans to meet your Mom for a dinner date.  She has lived in the area all of her life but she is totally confused on the location of the restaurant and how to get there. You have to give her an address and draw out a map and even then she is worried about the evening and talks endlessly on which direction she will take and she really has no clue how to use the cell phone that you have made sure she carries.  Your Dad has always been your rock.  He always knew what to do in any crisis.  Suddenly, he is of little help anymore because the world as he knew it no longer exists.  You actually feel smarter and more knowledgeable now than your own Father and in many ways it bothers you.  You don’t ever want to see your Father helpless.

One of your biggest fears is the realization that technology may one day escape you or you will have trouble with simple tasks.  You see it happen to your parents and somewhere in the recess of your mind, with all the rapid day to day changes, you know it will probably happen to you too.  This is part of the frustration you feel with your parents.  By watching them travel on the road into their senior years you are staring at your own life unfolding as you age. 

Be kind and be patient.  Your parents need your love and understanding and there is nothing for you to fear.  This is a natural progression in life and it is your chance to return the love and attention that your parents gave to you while they raised you.

It is said that we must accept change.  Never is it truer than with our aging parents. 

Tomorrow we will talk about meaningful ways of caring for our aging parents as they become more and more like our children.